Parental Mental Health

Parental mental health.  I attempt to make it a common topic of discussion when I start to see new children and teen clients, and I normalize the how common it is for parents to have mental health issues.  I make the topic a part of my discussion in intakes and the following beginning sessions.  When I do parent skill training, the topic of emotion regulation (ability to have control over one's emotional state) is always brought up.  Why?  If parents aren't happy children aren't happy. 

I once learned of an analogy of a rubber band. Imagine a parent has one end of a rubber band and the child has the other end of the rubber band.  The parent gives an instruction like, "Pick up the toys and put them in the toy box, now, please."  The child gets upset and pulls back the rubber band.  The rubber band starts to stretch.  The parent then gets angry. The  rubber band stretches more, and the child becomes more upset. The rubber band stretches even more.  If the parent doesn't regulate their emotions the child will continue to get more upset, and the rubber band could snap and/or break and hurt someone.  However, if the parent remains calm while the child pulls on the rubber band, the child will eventually calm down and the rubber band will not snap and/or hurt someone.  
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Children of parents with mental health issues are more likely to have mental health issues themselves according to research (Rishel, 2006). In a literature review (Gladstone, 2011), studies were compared to look at the effects of parental mental health on children.  The literature review found that out of 10 studies reviewed, out of the children who's parents reported having a mental illness children were reported to have a high risk of developing mental illness themselves or behavioral issues.  Also, there were tendencies for these children to struggle with cognition development, negative view of themselves, and a high risk for learning disabilities.  Out of those children within the literature review, only 78% of parents reported seeking mental health services at the time of information being gathered.

Parental mental health is very important.  When the rain pours it can be hard to see anything else.  Parents are children's best teachers.  Children need their parents to be mental present, calm,  and consistent to help teach children the skills they need to be successful.  If you are a parent struggling with mental health issues, you aren't alone, and it's okay for you to get help to.


Gladstone, B. M., Boydell, K. M., & McKeever, P. D. (2011). Children's experiences of parental mental illness: a literature review. 
Rishel CW, Greeno CG, Marcus SC, Anderson C. Effect of maternal mental health problems on child treatment response in community-based services. Psychiatric Services. 2006;57:716–719